This time

This time she’s not stressed about a call or text back,

She’s not worried about her insecurities holding her back from expressing what she really feels,

This time she’s smiling for no reason, her blood pressure is down, and she got no headaches or heartbreaks,

She’s not crying in the shower, going to work angry and lying to her coworkers about her so called ” happy relationship.

It’s true, you never know how bad you had it until you feel how good it can be.

She hated who she had slowly become way back when, when she couldn’t yet understand how someone who’s full of games play her, she played herself,

Her legs became tired of running and facing herself and being honest and real about her situationship

Instead, she had made it something she imagined and always daydreamed of having…true love.

This time she’s genuinely happy and at ease not worried about her person because they are open, honest and do what they say they are going to do,

This time She’s found what was kept from her ,what felt like a punishment for being good she is given loads of it,shit

this feels good,the type of good that doesnt wear off after you’ve climaxed,the type that last.

This time she’s free to be herself comfortably without fear or judgment or resentment.

Just growth in all aspects, the type that’s not just pillow talked about but actually executed.

Grown people ish this time.

She’s comfortable yet she feels adored in her own skin, no pretense everything is enough, she is enough and always has been..

This time is the first time she’s been in love.

Written by

L.G

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When will He give me a ring?

Have you guys seen the movie “He’s not that into you”? It is  a 2010  American movie  which features about four different couples and singles facing every day relationship problems which makes them conclude that their partner really is not that into them.

One of the couples featured is starlet Jennifer Anniston alongside Ben Affleck, who plays a couple that has been together for over seven years and has not been married. Ben Affleck’s character actually does not believe in marriage and rather just love and live together with his partner without ever committing to her. After being put into that realization Jennifer breaks up with Ben and concludes that if a man is with you for over seven years and has not married you ,he is never going to marry you.

This may sound like just another girl flick but I’ve come into contact with women who are in similar situations that got me wondering what are these women doing wrong?

I have this female friend of mine who has been with her boyfriend for a similar seven years and he has yet proposed. She’s a great cook, she caters to him and by the looks of things I know they love each other. She appears to be wifey material and she is a woman who knows what she wants yet still he cant seem to wife her. Their relationship has not been perfect though as he did mess up and there was someone else for a season of seven months. But they got through that and reconciled and today are happily in love again. She no doubt loves him and is waiting on that big question as she sees she can spend the rest of her life with him as they have been through the worst together.

There is this second couple I know  who has been together for five years and he has not proposed, they live together and they too has had their shares of infidelity but they stuck it out and  today they’re  still together and she does everything a wife suppose to do but he still hasn’t wifed her. The question is what are they doing wrong?

There is this third woman whose been with her partner for several years and they even got a seven year old son. He has given her nothing but stress although she has been a good woman to him. She’s cooked, cleaned and taken care of him and he has cheated on her several times and she stayed. Although this one I wouldn’t recommend she await any ring for it is a hopeless situation.

There are countless situations of  women with  men giving them their love, time, womb and devotion wondering what else they need to do for a man to propose and commit. I am recently single and I feel in a better stance to talk about things since I’ve been through a similar situation. Most times men don’t marry women they don’t respect and lots of men are afraid of commitment. Me personally feel that if a man is wasting your time you need to put your foot down and let him know what time it is. We as women should have standards and never put down those standards for any one not even your beloved. If those standards are constantly not being met I recommend walking away with your pride and dignity while you still have it.

P.S it is said that a man knows within the first six months of a relationship whether he wants to marry you or not.

Written by

Laurna Guiste

Lover’s Quarrel

She Walks in, sits on the bed, sits up and starts pacing the room,
He walks in; silent as a grave yard never looked at her, removes shoes,
“bae,we should talk” rolls eyes
“I just came from work. Woman please!
“I don’t care, heard you were with her?”
He never looks up,
Hands on waste “What’s her name?”
Silence, removes socks,
“Did you hear what I just said?, and I heard.. She starts crying,
He looks up at her, sighs,
“What? “He grumbles
“I heard she’s pregnant and it’s your child! “She continues crying,
He shakes his head, stands and puts his arms around her, she pushes him away, second advancement she resists,
“So! It is true? “She cried pushing him so hard he knocks the wall,
Passes his hands furiously through his hair, looks up at her, she was concerted, her baby face didn’t look angelic at the moment,
“Can’t you trust me, for once in your life? “He said sadly,
“Trust you?” she choked pointing her finger at him”You lied to me”
“Every time it’s you judging me and calling up some argument..?”
“I heard…”
“Who cares what you heard, I’m here aint i?
“But they said”
“They? “Bae if you love me, you would trust me and not them”
She lifts her hands in protest,”You are lying!”
“I did do some things..”he nodded
“I knew you were lying, you two-timer! Get out! “She screams picking up his shoes and handing them to him.
“Wait, Bae it was before us, before I, I got serious “he said as she motioned him to the door,
“Yea right, Get out!” she opened the door
“Believe what you want, but I think you know I love you, and I’m not perfect, I gave up those things for you, because you have dwelt in my heart and you’re the only woman who has touched my heart but if you want to believe them go ahead, but if you love me you would take me as I am”

Written by
Laurna Guiste

My Adam(Wedding Vows)

My Adam

I knew there was something different about the way you came into my life, subtly you let your light’s ray’s beam through the spaces I didn’t even know existed. I wasn’t expecting to fall, but then again this doesn’t even feel like falling, I stand firmly knowing that this isn’t fleeting because you took the time to know me, learn me, trust me, you touched a part of me no man has ever touched, so deep is what I am feeling, it is more than just a feeling, explain to me how does one feel from their soul? I understand you like you understand me and we share differences, but they don’t disturb me, I kind of like them, na I love them. I admire the uniqueness in which you pronounce my name, sort of melt when you whisper in my ear “babe.” Giggles I’m on cloud nine, don’t love you just because you are fine and sweet, but you’re intelligent got me hyped and I am learning and you are learning from me, so in each other’s life we become students playing even when it’s after 3(three).

Holding conversations about life ,anything and everything, I’m not afraid to let my guard down ,or act a clown because you my audience and I won’t let you wear no frown, so we enjoy playing around, laughing till we don’t even know what we are laughing for to begin with. Don’t know how we came together to begin with but all I know is I want my life to end with you, baby I don’t know how you do what you do, but your kind of loving motivates me not only to love and treat you better, but to be a better person.

You inspire me and your love revives a part of me that was dormant through formality, your fun personality awakens that side of me, together we are silly geniuses creating a world of love and blue skies, we hold hands and together we can change lives, aid in molding a generation that will seek God as much as we do. Baby I love you and I can’t begin to picture a life without you, you are my Adam, and you have bitten a piece of my heart, I don’t care because I gave it to you and today we show the world that we are ONE and will always be.

Written by
Laurna Guiste

Dream VS Lesson

Dream I had recently
I got the inspiration to write about a dream I had recently due to a blog a sister shared and I found them to be sort of similar, I guess it was a reminder and a need to share this message with you guys.
I dreamed I was getting married and on the wedding day the groom was nowhere to be seen, my family were busy into catering and I got really puzzled as to who he was. After much confusion I decided I was going to call off the wedding, but I was too ashamed/embarrassed to inform my family since they already had prepared everything.

In my pursuit of locating the groom at the church I saw my ex sitting at the front row, I rushed up to him and hoped he was the groom, getting closer to him I realized he was dressed shabbily but had his usual big smile on his face, we greeted each other and I sat next to him and I couldn’t understand why he wasn’t my groom. The entire church was waiting and I didn’t know who my husband was.
I was persuaded there was no wedding and had to end this charade, as I was about to make the announcement the setting changed to the reception area, and here comes the groom through the doors surrounded by people, he was smiling and waving everyone and guess what ..he was a Muslim.

He wasn’t what I was expected but he was drop dead gorgeous, I remember thinking that our religion/beliefs were different but he was good looking and that was enough for me. I quickly jumped on his arm and headed at the back of the church. When it was time to walk down the aisle I rushed up to my brother who was the dj and asked him to play my wedding song by Johnny Gill he couldn’t find it on the computer got pissed as I realized I never saved it in my playlist. So I told him to play anything , minutes later we were walking down the aisle dancing to this loud obnoxious, out of place soca music and the weird thing is we were all dancing and moving to it. Lolz
MORALE OF THE DREAM
As I survey this dream I realize that I got married for the wrong reason, I fell for this guy’s looks without any regard to his background, beliefs, goals, morals or anything deep or permanent rooted in the core of his being. All I saw was the outside, I became infatuated, lusted and was stirred by mare feelings instead of pondering the life changing decision I was making. Marriage as we know should be forever, and love is not mare looks, it is patient, kind and comes with forming a deep connection, it is acceptance of that persons good and bad, cherishing and caring for them beyond your soul regardless of how they look or what they have done.

I guess this dream proves how shallow we women and men can sometimes be when it comes to choosing a mate for life, I bet looks is on top of that list. Also, love shouldn’t be rushed, or confusing, in the dream I didn’t even know the man I was going to get married to, I was disorganized and seemed lost.

Marriage should be planned, organized and you both should be on the same level, romantically, spiritually, socially, overall you should want the same things, you should take time to know each other and decide if you can handle this for life. Notice I said looks and not attraction, I support that you be attracted to your mate 100% and have of course chemistry, what I am referring to here is beauty and charm, appealing body types, love is more than the physical and it is kept by nothing else than a strong foundation which is God.

Written by
Laurna Guiste

Way to a man’s heart

Are there specific ways to a man’s heart ,I mean except through his stomach, are there about five basic guidelines a woman can follow in order to get and keep her man. Being friends with women who have been through not so perfect relationships, going from relationship to relationship, left heart broken and confused about the heck happened? What did we do wrong and why didn’t he stay other than the guy being a prick, some of us women do drive men away.
So in this piece I would like to state at least five guidelines in keeping your man.

*Make him happy/smile a man appreciates a woman who puts a smile on his face, makes him laugh, lighten up and
enjoy her company.

*A woman who supports and understands his dreams. Be his biggest cheer leader, back rubber and motivator.

*A woman who gives him attention. Remembers what cereal he likes, pays attention to the details that shapes his life,surprise him with favorite treats etc.

*A woman who shows him love,hugs,kisses,not only tells him but shows him,

*A woman who shows him respect
Written by
Laurna Guiste

MY GUY..

Tucking my baby gently into bed, making sure I cater to all of his needs, satisfying till the Wii hours of the morning, I love him

Waking early to make his lunch, making breakfast extra crispy, just how he likes it, placing it away neatly in his pack,

Rubbing his back kissing him good bye,

Sending him love notes during the day, picking up his favourite snacks, mm

Never doubting that his loving isn’t all mine, not holding back on mine, giving him all of me,

Supporting, encouraging, motivating, appreciating him just the way God made him,

Nothing soothes his ego more than making him know he’s the only king of your heart and he’s doing a good job at whatever he does!

In return he puts me to bed, gladly makes him tuck me in, he caters to all my needs, satisfies till the Wii hours of the morning

Waking early to make me lunch and breakfast just the way I like it, placing it neatly in my pack,

Kiss me goodbye

Yes that’s my guy!

Written by Laurna Guiste

Wife preparations PART TWO (couple reminders)

Wife preparations PART TWO (couple reminders)
Recent advice given to me by a friend for young women aspiring to be wives.
Firstly one should be in this for the marriage and not only want a wedding. It is a lifelong commitment, after the reception and the honeymoon is over, you have to wake up to this person for the rest of your life.
A wife should be able to take care of whatever her husband provides for her and the home. For instance a husband provides groceries, the wife is to be able to cook and prepare that food. He builds a house; she ought to make that house into a home. Make it inviting and welcoming, keep it clean and peaceful. The place her husband considers his haven, his sweetest place.

A wife should embrace her husband’s friends. She should allow him to bring his friends home, if having his friends over is a problem then the husband will go out to meet his friends and hence she will see less of him. Never make a man choose between you and his friends as his boys” and family, where there before you.

Always allow your husband to have the final say, voice your opinion, bring ideas to the table, but as the head of the house your husband should have the final say, so at the end of the day he can never blame you for it.

A wife should be positive, easy to talk to, and trust her husband. Though a man may have many female friends whom he flirts with doesn’t mean he’s sleeping with them. He married you, he chose you over them because there is something about you that stood out, so be secure that he loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you only.
Written by Laurna Guiste

Wife preparations is a special blog corner aimed at encouraging young women aspiring to be great wives, giving training tips and advice. My aim is to raise an awareness of what marriage entails and to ensure that we know what we as young women are heading into and what is expected of us.

Do not lose thyself woman..

Do not lose thyself woman
A young man observes her as she dances, twirling her hips, licking lips, and shaking her ass-sets,
Eyes griped her every motion, making love with her in the rooms of his mind,
After the show is over she removes the makeup, breath heavy now with coffee, not with the liquor which she posed, she’s removed her panty hose, and now reading a paper he can’t portray her as nothing else than that exotic dancer he dearly wants.

No topic she throws across would change his mind to capture her firmly in his space, the fire she had awaken wasn’t going to be quenched over small talk or getting to know each other. The woman who she peered to be wasn’t registering as one of seriousness, though she could have been.
This dame reeked of passion, dark halls, red lip stick and stilettos, great sex, nothing else.
A night of good fun, a text to tell her the wife isn’t home that’s what he’ll tell her..

Are these what women what to be portrayed as, one night stands, remembered for motels and fast cars, or we more than these?! Are we worth getting to know, being dined and introduced to his family? Are we wifey material or we jumping into bed before we even know his real background and the man he really is. When we as women give up the cookie too fast men somehow lose respect for us women and remove all image of taking us seriously. It is a new era where self-respect is not given freely but is fiercely gained.

Written by Laurna Guiste

The difference between a Boo and a boo-boo

In the short span of time I’ve dated and gotten to know men on an intimate level I have come familiar with a few terms used to describe or refer to the opposite sex. There are several pet names that are affiliated with the ones that we love, it only comes naturally for one to refer to their lover, spouse, fiancé, boyfriend or girlfriend using a particular name. Some folks actually find it fun to make up names to call their love ones, such as pew bear, honey bunch of oats or my personal favourite boo.
However, this piece aims at identifying if there is a significant difference between a boo and a boo-boo. First of all one can claim that the urban term boo refers to an affectionate name, mainly used by coloured folks to call their lover or girlfriend. First time that term registered was from hearing Alicia Keys and Ushers song “My Boo” boo here obviously refers to one that you love dearly. The term boo-boo on the other hand has been somewhat thrown and tossed all over the place and has no real significant meaning. I have heard it been used among friends, co-workers when they were most likely referring to a side chick, or a close friend even, not one taken seriously. It is as if the word boo on its own is too strong a word so boo-boo is emphasized twice so some level of seriousness is eliminated. I may be gaging this slightly wrong but I believe there is some level of truth in there, so I would think twice about calling my boyfriend a “boo-boo”.

Written by Laurna Guiste