Women hold grudges,years pass by and we hold unto it closer than we hug our best friends..
She hated work ,Alice felt like she was being haunted by all her past lovers as she wore insecurity as a daily garment,worn in rag like attire,not pretty at all,rather uncomfortable. She often felt embarrassed that others could see its dirty edges beneath her formal wear and most likely they did.
Alice had many boyfriends or guys she got close to,flirted with foreplay which ended before she even knew she was in a game of being heart broken. She felt prey to many situation ships and it added to her grotesque robe of pity and hatred.
Alice couldn’t bear seeing her exes lovers or girlfriends as she often compared her self to them living her incomplete and unhappy. Life seemed to be cruel to Alice as she began seeing them more often.
She felt life was unfair as they seemed to be on every road she strutted upon,at every corner,she felt the envy at every meeting,the long,hard stares,the awkward silence,the gazes,she felt they knew her stories because she was stupid enough to share them with him.
Alice was like many women creating her own monsters in her head,fighting her existence,trying to prove herself to her allies that she too was worthy. Jealousy choked her like a heavy bead necklace she couldn’t dare rest at the dressing table before bed at night.
She compared her curves,her eyes,her hands,lips to hers,her reflection in the mirror was never kind as she thought he’d always prefer hers.
Alice was living a lie,sealed in a shell of self deception as she held unto something that was no longer in her grip. She had to fight off the demon of her insecurity and be grounded in who she is and love that person fiercely.
Alice owed it to herself to let go, move on,be strong and be free from comparisons and be and LOVE her individual self as God would desire her too.
Chronicles of a Woman’s Mind..
Written by Laurna Guiste