I can’t ,I can

I can..

Don’t let this smile fool you, its fake,
This is my new face lift, trying to hide and cover up my mistakes,
I have sort of numbed my feelings, stepped out of reality,
Because my reality, scares me, bores me, it’s kind of sad really,
The way someone hangs unto the past and let it define them,
Sort of a puppet on a string it controls them, and it mimes them
Don’t be happy be sad, don’t get angry be glad,
Sort of a up and down kind of a thing,
It’s like me and melancholy got a fling,
Go ahead; live me in my misery I Don’t care a thing,
Live me drown in self-pity, who cares anyway,
But ,
just when I am about to succumb to my wounds and wallow in my weaknesses,
I hear a still voice that surpasses,
that of any man
In the stillness I hear the words I can, I can… I can
I can choose,
To be free,
or to be mean,
To be free or to drown in sin,
Delve in my chaotic vomit, my oppression of the past,
And how they failed me
And I failed them,
Today I can,
But today,
I choose to be strong
And move on!

Written by
Laurna Guiste